![]() If I ignore the timer or ask for more time, that trust will be broken and he won’t believe me when I say I’ll be done. When I use the timer, I have to actually stop working and be with my son when the timer goes off, even if I’m not done yet.īy following through, I’m showing him that he matters and that I can keep my promises. It’s been a great tool but there are some tricks to make it work. It’s even gotten to the point that he’ll ask to use the timer when he see’s that I’m busy. Since that day, I continue to use a timer and he’s learning to wait. He gets the playtime he desires, and I got something checked off my list. We play LEGO together and we’re both happy. The timer goes off and he finds me in milliseconds. It’s amazing how much I can do without kids underfoot. With the timer set, I finish loading and unloading the laundry and even get the clean load folded and put away. My son runs over to the kitchen counter and yells, “ Hey Alexa? Set a timer for 5 minutes.” How about I set a timer for 20 minutes and when the timer goes off, I’ll play with you?” “Ok kiddo, I hear that you want me to play but I have some things that I need to do first. Instead of acting on my frustration, I pause and think. I know his love language is attention, but it still gets under my skin. I feel defeated and frustrated because I can never live up to his need for attention. ![]() I want to scream “what do you mean I never play with you?! I play ! We JUST got finished building together! I have some things that I need to do, and I can’t play with you every second of the day! What do you WANT from me!?” His response, “But you NEVER play with me!”Ī combination of guilt and frustration take over me. So, I respond, “No honey, I can’t play right now, I have laundry I have to finish.” I know my son wants my attention, but right now, I need to get my stuff done. But, his need for attention is part of his personality, it’s just who he is. He has quiet time in his room every day and I even did independent playtime with him when he was younger. I have tried teaching him how to play independently. I take frequent breaks to play with him, we even have special time for us just to play together. I include him in the chores and what I’m doing. “Mommy, come look at this!”, “Mommy, help me!”, “Mommy, what ya doing?”, “Mommy, play with me?” Every time I step away to do anything I need or want to do, he’s calling me back. Every time I turn around, this boy asks me to play.Īctually, I just spent the better part of an hour helping him build his LEGO police station and fire station and all the cars that go with them.īut my boy is only happy when I’m near him. I swear this is the hundredth time he’s asked me to play today. We're just focusing on the game ahead, and we're trying to do the best we can.I’m standing in the laundry room, moving a load from the washer to the dryer with one load waiting to go in, and another that needs to be folded.Īs I’m hunched over, pulling clothes out of the wash, I hear little footsteps and my 5 year old’s voice behind me. (Last year's game) was discussed by a few people, but it hasn't really been brought up. So it's very important to try and put it on the line for this area. "We've always had the argument about which area is better, New Haven or Fairfield. "It's very important to represent New Haven County," Matthew Sponheimer said. Matthew, who was a Class L coaches' all-state selection as a senior, says it's an honor to play for New Haven County, and the squad is hoping to avenge last year's 31-30 double-overtime defeat. Said Matthew: "I like to call it constructive criticism." There's some general encouragement at times." "He might describe it a little bit different. I would probably be able to coach at least half of the Ansonia games, and see every Notre Dame game."Īlthough John is coaching Matthew for the first time, there has been several dinner-time discussions in the past between father and son on the topic of athletics. We were able to coordinate a lot of games. "The hard part was missing the Ansonia games, being on the phone calling Kevin Rowley (an Ansonia assistant) every two or three minutes trying to see what's going on.
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